The next day after the party, which is my actual birthday do not turn out to be a good one. However, i had expected it to turn out this way, so i not too disappointed by it.

The first disappointment is when I had an arguement with kelvin in the afternoon when he refused to fetch me over to his place in the afternoon. I dun mind travelling to his place but its my birthday, why cant i have some special treatment from this "BF"???

He give excuses that he is tired bla bla bla, and will oli fetch me in the evening when we go for dinner with his friends.. Well, this is the 2nd disappointment. He is the first bf i seen who dun spend the whole day with gf on her birthday... therefore, in the end, im cried on my birthday and intended to slp the whole afternoon away (same as the last few yrs).

TIm knows about it and its very nice of him to cum over to my place with a cake and a gift to celebrate my birthday.. Very sweet and thoughtful of him!!! In the end, i still managed to make good use of the afternoon by spening the afternoon with him at H.V cafe.

By the evening, i met up with Kelvin and his friends. But im not very happy with him so i also didnt dress up for the nite. What i wear is even more casual than going for my classes.. We had dinner then we went to a ktv pub for some drinks.

He bought me a cake, saying aloud to his friends that i like to celebrate my birthday in this way, making alot of friends and slicing cake on my birthday. This is my third disappointment and provoked me as well. To me, he is indirectly making me feel awkward infront of his friends..

So this is how well my "BF" understand me.. I dun know where he get the idea that i like to celebrate with his friends.. The funniest part is that his FRIENDS are the one who sing the birthday song and he juz keep away the cake after i blew out the candles, saying that everyone is very full, unable to eat the cake. I didnt heard his friends saying that, and i am not epecting them to eat a big portion of the cake. Maybe just a few bites is ok mah. Dun tell me that the stomach of guys is similar to the stomach of an ants. At most if cant finish, i can give it to the waiters and other people in the pubs. However, he just pack it back into the box and ask me to bring it hm.

At this point of time, i can feel the lava flowing out of my volcano le.. I believe his friends can feel the "heat" as well. But i still managed to put a fake smile and place afew cushion and my bag in the middle, separating the two of us.

After we finish our beer, Kelvin fetch me home annd before i get out of his car. He just told me that there are something at the back of his car for me. As usual... a gift to compensate the emptiness feeling in me.

I wonder if he is deaf. I told him more than 20 times that i will appreciate more if he can provides more care and concern to me rather than giving me a gift. Ya, gifts can make a person amile, but it cant filled the emptiness in me.

He dun even see me up to my hm, and drive away once i shut his car's door. After i reach hm, i start a whole series of sms war wit him. He revealed in his sms that he dunnoe what happened to me, but he feel that i had changed alot and even his friends can sense it. Ya, i admit i had changed in term of my mentality. I dun wan to give in to him anymore, dun wan to be a victim of his sacrastic remarks and disrespect for me. How can i believe that he can take gd care of me in the future after we get married.. He is so egoistic and dun show much concern to me.. i scare i will regret if i married him in the future.. But what cause all this changes, and can he blamed me for it?

Everytime i wanted to confront him, he sure avoid it. I dun understand why guys likes to avoid confrontation. Why they can't be a man, face it and solve it.. So it ended up in me keeping everything to myself as he wont listen to me. And once i had enough, ofcos i will throw temper and close the door to my heart.

Haiz. enough of saying abt him le.. my fingers are numb from typing le. What im looking forward is my bangkok trip with the gals. By that time, through kelvin action, i think i can decide on what i want le. This is the final chance im giving him le. If he still insist that im in the wrong.. then.. the everything will be written in history btw me n him....