Today, im quite bored at home... Initially i wanted to start doing my assignment, but in the end im too lazy to do it. I waste the whole day at home surfing net and download songs. I also dunnoe what happen to me out of a suddenly when i go n open up a folder that i been avoiding all this while, since the begining of this year.

I look through all the photos and video clips taken during last 2 years and all memories flow back to my mind... Recalling all the happy memories spent at KL, Batam, Desaru, Genting etc and ofcos all the sad moments, disappointments and tears. After looking through the photos, i suddenly just feel like opening up the gift box that i been hiding it away from my sight.

It contains all the gifts, cards and other stuffs belonging to both of us. As i look through it, I keep asking myself if i am really ready to put down this relationship and look forward to my future without him, or am i just avoiding my own feelings.. by putting my focus on studies and other stuffs, make myself mentally and physcally so tired that i wont not have the strength to think of other things.

Until now, i still unable to find the ans to this question.. Maybe is due to the negative impacts of my previous breakup with li sheng which result in me suffering from mental breakdown. I used around 2 years plus to pick myself up again and I dunnoe if i will end up in the same state again if i break up for this time. What i know is that I dun think i can go through another round of such mental breakdown anymore. The feeling is horrible and everyday is like living in the mixture of tears and saddness.

When is my guardian angel coming to guide me a direction and rescue me from all this agony.... Im still waiting....